Look for the silver lining in getting older

By: ROSEMARY BURNS | Times-Dispatch
Published: January 09, 2011

Here's something I bet a lot of you have wondered. How does AARP know when you are about to turn the big 5-0!?

AARP applications began showing up in my west Henrico mailbox on a regular basis when I was about 49 1/2 or maybe even sooner.

I just scoffed at them thinking that they must have me mixed up with some other Rosemary Burns, some other Rosemary Burns who was O-L-D!

When those nuisances started arriving, sometimes two and three a week, my emotions ran from denial to irritation, anger, consideration and finally acceptance.

At first, my younger husband thought it was amusing to watch me squirm as he handed me the mail. But after several death stares from me, he just handed them over silently.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm fine with being 50 years old. After all, isn't 50 the new 30? I am healthy enough, enjoy working out, eating right, I take vitamins and supplements and still have two small kids at home who help keep me young.

It was the prospect of turning 50 in August that haunted me for a year. I kept thinking, "Not me. There is no possible way! How did this happen?"

But it happens, so you might as well deal with it the best way you know how.

Debra Hayer, 56, of Richmond, said being happy with who you are helps make getting older a little easier.

"You simply need to accept yourself the way God made you," Hayer said.

And don't compare yourself to other women because doing so is a disservice to yourself, she said.

Pam Oeler, 54, of Arlington, director of special events at a trade association, takes the age-is-just-a-number approach. She said she "tries not to pay attention to her chronological age."

Even so, she still works to stay healthy and suggests that as women get older we should try to get as much exercise as possible.

Leah Husk, a Richmond area fitness expert, offers some other tips to feel younger as your age quietly — but quickly — creeps higher.

"Stay active," Husk advises. "Always walk like you are late for something. Try to break a sweat at least three to four times per week."

Husk also reminds us to watch what we eat. One rule she offers is to eat things that come in their own wrappers such as fruit and vegetables.

Finally, she said, women need to look for ways to reduce our stress levels.

"Take at least five minutes of your day to sit quietly and decompress by disengaging physically and mentally and honoring your breathing," Husk said. "It is like Teflon when you are met with stress."

I also discovered that sometimes you have to look for the silver lining in getting older.

My husband, an accountant, pointed out the economic advantage to joining AARP. By signing up, I would qualify for some pretty decent discounts at hotels, car rental companies, insurance and more.

I perused the bulletins and found that they contain a lot of useful age-appropriate information and news about medicines, exercise, travel, trivia and cooking. So I joined.

I am now a proud member of AARP. Those four letters that at first infuriated me are now just like some of the other letters — AAA, YMCA, AOL, ODU — that represent a part of my life and reflect a little of who I am.

Rosemary Burns is a stay-at-home mom and freelance writer.