Mentoring: Children need caring adults

Often I meet young people who are just looking for guidance and someone to talk to. Many of them are looking for help with everyday problems. In many cases these young people just need a listening ear from someone who cares.

Consider the following scenario: A young boy meets with his mentor in his school on a weekly basis over a two-year period. Concentrating on developing a healthy relationship, the mentor and mentee read, play games (with the mentee mostly winning), write stories that separate the boy's reality from his imagination, share a meal, explore the school garden and look for learning sites online in the media center.

The joyousness of their meetings is often tainted by tales of challenges in school, with friends and at home — but the mentor and mentee continue to enjoy their visits, especially a hearty game of checkers while they talk. The possibility of the mentee moving to another school enters the conversation with promises to connect as mentor and mentee wherever the young mentee lands.

The mentor uses all the skills and tools learned from mentor training and, with the follow-up provided by his program coordinator to support the relationship, is rewarded in their mutually satisfying relationship.

What young people need is a mentor, a caring adult who can provide one-on-one human interaction. Research indicates that the presence of a caring adult can be a protective factor, one that contributes to the healthy development of a child.

Mentors positively affect a child's grades, scores on standardized testing, and they keep them out of trouble with the law. Mentees also see an increase of their own self-esteem and develop a favorable outlook on their teachers and other adults as well.

In localities where the Virginia Mentoring Partnership (VMP) has supported the growth of the mentoring movement, where sustainable mentoring relationships have been nurtured and have thrived, we have witnessed a parallel improvement in mentee outcomes and in the culture of the mentoring site.

According to "Mentoring in America: A Snapshot of the Current State of Mentoring," a study conducted by MENTOR/The National Mentoring Partnership, it is estimated that nationally 18 million young people could especially benefit from having a mentor, but only 3 million are in formal, one-to-one mentoring relationships. In Richmond alone it has been estimated that 15,000 young people could benefit from having a mentor but do not have one.

The Virginia Mentoring Partnership plays an essential role in closing the "mentoring gap," impacting the lives of children for the better. The support that VMP provides to each trained mentor enables Virginia mentors to help improve many outcomes for their mentees.

Serving as the engine to drive productive mentoring experiences, Virginia Mentoring Partnership's services span the commonwealth through mentor training and technical assistance to the legions of adults who mentor our youth. The "safety net" that we cast is far and wide, and the benefits have been witnessed through the diligent work of these caring adults serving Virginia's children.

Working together with mentoring organizations such as Big Brothers/Big Sisters, Armstrong Leadership Program, Communities in Schools and Concerned Black Men of Richmond, among others — all of whom are in need of volunteer mentors — we can positively impact the lives of children in our community.

At some point in all of our lives we have had someone who was there for us. Someone who said, "You can do it," "Let me show you how," "I believe in you." Mentoring requires a few hours of your time, but it lasts for a lifetime.

I am here today because I had a mentor in my life. Be the change you want to see. You can change a life forever.