SAVVY SENIOR

Q:What can you tell me about online dating? My 34-year-old daughter met her husband-to-be on the Internet and has been encouraging me to give it a try. But at age 60, and eight years divorced, I'm a little gun-shy.

Answer: If you're not sure whether to take the plunge, visit a few dating sites and look around. Most services allow you to check out their members at no cost or obligation. Then, if you like what you see, you can sign up (fees range between $20 and $60 per month) and start e-mailing members you're interested in or they can e-mail you. Most sites also offer instant messaging and chat rooms.

Here are some tips to get started.

• Research your options: There are dozens of Internet matchmaking sites such as the big general-interest ones (Match.com and eHarmony.com); over-50 dating sites (PrimeSingles.net, SeniorFriendFinder.com and SeniorMatch.com); and niche sites that match people based on their interests, religion and ethnicity.

Before choosing, research the differences, looking at things like the percentage of men vs. women and how many of them live in your area. Online-Dating-Zone.com is a good resource to help you compare. (Note: If you don't want to spend any money, try PlentyOfFish.com, a free dating Web site that's become very popular.)

• Be honest: When you join a dating site, you'll need to create a personality profile. If you need help, AARP offers an interactive Personal Ad Maker that can help you create a profile. Go to www. AARPMagazine.org/lifestyle and click on "Create your own personal ad."

Sites such as ProfileHelper.com or E-cyrano.com also can help you for a fee.

• Be safe: When you register with a dating service you remain anonymous. No one gets your full name, address, phone number or e-mail address until you decide to give it out. Before meeting in person, chat on the phone several times, and always meet in a public place.

• Be skeptical: Some people will exaggerate or flat out lie in their profiles, or post pictures of themselves that are not very true-to-life. If they look or sound too good to be true, they probably are.

• Make the effort: Don't be afraid to make the first move. When you find someone you like, send a short note that says, "I really enjoyed your profile. I think we have some things in common." Keep it simple.

• Be strong: If you don't get a response from someone, don't let it get in your head. Just move on. There are others who will be interested in you and it only takes one person to make Internet dating worthwhile.

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If dating sites don't appeal to you, consider a social-networking site. There are sites (Eons.com, Boomj.com and Rezoom.com) created specifically for boomers and beyond that are great places to meet people without the stigma or pressure of finding a mate.

Jim Miller is editor of the Savvy Senior. Send your senior questions to Savvy Senior, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070, or visit http://www.savvysenior.org.