Au pair cares for Henrico teen, wins international recognition

On the day Ricardo Araújo arrived in the U.S., he briefly considered turning around and going home to Brazil.

He was overwhelmed by homesickness, the English language and the task that lay ahead of him: Providing care, as an au pair, for a disabled teen in Henrico County who cannot speak or do much of anything else for himself.

But Ricardo resisted the urge to climb back on a plane and instead went to meet his host family, the Boyers. When he first saw Taylor Boyer, whom he would be caring for, Ricardo said a little prayer and told himself, “I will do my best. I will treat him like my brother.“

Whatever doubts he privately harbored were not evident to the Boyer family as Ricardo walked into their western Henrico home that day as if he were merely a neighbor stopping by. He went straight to Taylor, grasped his hand and said, “Hello, my friend.“

Ricardo will never forget the moment. Neither will Taylor’s parents, Kim and John, who can barely recount the episode without choking back tears.

“It was so sweet,“ Kim Boyer said.

Almost two years later, Ricardo, 24, soft-spoken and well-organized, and Taylor, 17, an enthusiastic bundle of hugs and high-fives, have become, as Ricardo imagined, like brothers. And the Boyer family has grown by one.

“I just love him,“ Kim Boyer said of Ricardo, who showed up only days before the Boyers’ daughter was to be married and pitched right in as wedding preparations swirled around him. “He’s like one of my sons.“

An award-winning son.

In March, Ricardo was named the International Au Pair of the Year for his compassionate work with Taylor, winning out over an estimated 50,000 au pairs around the world. Nominated by the Boyers, Ricardo was presented with the award at the International Au Pair Association conference in Vienna, Austria. He later was honored in Los Angeles at a national meeting of Cultural Care Au Pair, the Massachusetts agency that matched him with the Boyers.

Au pairs are young foreign nationals — those who come to the United States are ages 18 to 26 — who participate in the home life of a host family by providing child-care services. Au pairs receive a weekly stipend, as well as room and board. They also attend classes at local colleges or universities. They can stay with their host families for up to two years.

A few au pairs are those providing care for special-needs children. At Cultural Care, for example, only 6 percent of its host families — 500 of the 8,000 families — have children with special needs, said Susan Robinson, a spokeswoman for the program.

Ricardo is the third au pair employed by the Boyers to help care for Taylor, the youngest of their four children.

Taylor was a typical baby, progressing normally until, at age 6 months, he suffered a severe reaction to an immunization that resulted in seizures and made him stop breathing for a time. He spent considerable time in hospital intensive-care units, and the ongoing seizures resulted in a severe cognitive and intellectual disability, his parents said.

At age 4, he had a vocabulary of about 70 words. Now, he speaks only five or 10, and those aren’t easy to understand. He is considered severely mentally disabled, and still suffers periodic, violent seizures.

But, Kim said, “Even though he’s non-verbal, he knows exactly what we’re doing and what we’re saying.“

Taylor has always required constant care. Because of his daily medications, he didn’t sleep well or long when he was younger and often was awake all night. He’s still prone to seizures that can occur at any moment. The family is accustomed to living on the edge.

“We were in crisis mode all the time,“ John Boyer said.

“Those were the darkest days,“ Kim said of Taylor’s younger days. “It’s really so much better now.“

The older Boyer children — one is in college, the other two have graduated and are working — have been immensely helpful in caring for their younger brother, their parents said. As Taylor became more mobile, he also became more compulsive and didn’t understand things such as why he shouldn’t run into the street. He always needed one-on-one attention, which often was happily provided by his older siblings.

But as the children grew older and began leaving home,the Boyers — John is in medical sales, Kim is a nursing supervisor and together they run an ice cream shop that they believe might make for a more manageable career once Taylor ages out of the public school program — began looking for additional help and turned to au pairs. All three (the first two were from Poland) have been godsends, the Boyers said, and all have become members of the family.

“Such a richness has come into our lives,“ John said.

From a different perspective, Ricardo says the same thing.

A journalism major in college, Ricardo was working in customer service for a Brazilian oil company — a good, but high-pressure job — when he got the itch to do something different. He wanted to learn English, and he wanted to challenge himself. He applied to become an au pair.

The waiting list is usually longer for male au pairs, so to enhance his chances Ricardo expressed a willingness to work with a special-needs child. He had done volunteer work with children with Down syndrome, so was not daunted by the thought. When the call came from the Boyers, he readily accepted.

Exactly how much of a challenge he signed on for wasn’t truly apparent until he arrived.

Ricardo said his mission is this:

Treat Taylor with respect and treat him, as closely as he can, like a normal teenager. They stroll shopping malls, where Taylor likes to ride the escalators. They browse clothing stores so Taylor can organize the hangers. They visit Deep Run Park. They look for pretty girls. They go for burgers and fries.

When they drive up to McDonald’s, Taylor gasps — as if his breath is taken away by the most joyous sight — and he applauds.

“Taylor responds so well; he really seems to understand and appreciate it,“ Kim said. “They’re just buddies. [Araújo] has shown me how to take care of Taylor .¤.¤. and not baby him.“

The Boyers work long hours, so Ricardo often spoon-feeds Taylor breakfast and dinner — Taylor loves scrambled eggs with cheese — and makes sure he takes the small pile of pills that help prevent seizures. Ricardo typically walks Taylor to the school bus in the morning for the ride to Deep Run High, and meets him in the afternoon when the bus brings him home. The greetings usually include a hug and many smiles.

“It’s just one of the purest things you’ll see on earth,“ John said of the love expressed by Taylor for Ricardo and the previous au pairs.

Taylor seems to thrive under the consistency of the daily routine Ricardo has set up for him. Ricardo performs even the most private of tasks for Taylor with a level of dignity that leaves the Boyers in awe.

When Taylor fell critically ill earlier this year, Ricardo spent long days at the hospital with the rest of the Boyer family.

“If you want to work with Taylor, you need to love him,“ Ricardo said. “And I love him.“

Ricardo is channeling his mother, a retired schoolteacher back in his hometown of Natal who taught him to be organized, to have faith and to always — always — “make a good impression, because people judge us for every action,“ her son said.

At turns, it has been a difficult time in the U.S. On his first Christmas away from home, the agonizing homesickness returned and Ricardo nearly bought a ticket back to Brazil. Last fall, his grandmother died and he was unable to return home.

“Saddest day of my life,“ he said.

Overall, though, he has relished his time here, and he signed up for a second year, which was not a requirement, so he could improve his English. He said his award is a huge source of pride for his mother and father, a retired truck driver who has been diagnosed with cancer.

Although he planned to return to Brazil in November, Ricardo’s plans changed and he departed last week. He and the Boyers were distressed that he had to leave sooner than expected.

“We will miss him so much and hope to visit him in Brazil someday,“ said Kim Boyer.

Ricardo has said he is not certain what he will do once he gets home. He’s thinking about graduate school; he might try to go back to the oil company.

But he knows this: After what he’s done the last two years, he’s pretty sure he can tackle just about anything.

Contact Bill Lohmann at (804) 649-6639 or .


Contact Eva Russo at (804) 649-6382 or