PAUL WOODY COLUMN: From the coaches, infusion of confusion

LANDOVER, Md. For all you young people hoping one day to coach in the NFL, or anywhere else, don't try this at home.

On fourth and 1 at the opponent's 2-yard line, when a field goal means your opponent has to score a touchdown in the final 1:55 to beat you, and that oppo nent has no timeouts and has scored just one touchdown in eight quarters this season, don't go for the first down.

Kick the field goal.

On third and goal at the opponent's 5, don't call a halfback option for a halfback who is not nearly as gifted a passer as he thinks.

The quarterback is paid millions to pass in that situation. When you tell the halfback to make the pass, you're telling your quarterback you don't trust him.

That's the last thing a coach wants to convey to his quarterback.

And never, ever, call your last timeout of the game with 9:25 left in the fourth quarter as the St. Louis Rams did yesterday.

What happened on the field between the Washington Redskins and Rams often wasn't pretty.

The decisions made on the sidelines often defied logic.

The Rams have a rookie coach, Steve Spagnuolo, and rookie offensive and defensive coordinators. They're going to make mistakes.

The Redskins have a second-year coach, Jim Zorn, and he should know better. It's one thing to be bold. It's another to take foolish risks, and Zorn took some foolish risks.

He got away with them because the Redskins won 9-7.

The Redskins locker room was quiet when Zorn walked in after the game. The players knew the team that deserved to lose less had won.

"It was quiet because we won in such an ugly fashion," said Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall. "You don't even really take pride in the win."

Zorn took his playcalling to some strange places yesterday.

First, there was the halfback option pass for Clinton Portis in the third quarter.

The Redskins were on the Rams' 5-yard line, and Portis didn't have a lot of options. The Rams had almost all their players in front of him, and Portis had no place to run. Tight end Chris Cooley was covered, so Portis had no place to pass.

The Redskins were fortunate nothing worse happened than Portis' shot-put like effort fell incomplete.

Mind-boggling is the only way to describe Zorn's decision to go for a first down with two minutes remaining, the Redskins holding a two-point lead and the ball on the Rams 2-yard line. Portis not only failed to gain the yard needed for a first down, he lost 2 yards.

A field goal would have meant the Rams needed to score a touchdown to win. St. Louis' only touchdown this season came in the second quarter yesterday.

"I hope I was using my brain," Zorn said. "If they could drive 99 yards or 75 to kick a field goal, then it would've been the wrong choice. But they didn't."

Zorn apparently didn't see the Virginia Tech-Nebraska game Saturday, where Virginia Tech, inoffensive all day, went 88 yards, with no timeouts, in 1:23 and scored a touchdown to win 16-15.

"He did the right thing," said Redskins defensive end Phillip Daniels. "If you kick the field goal, we have to kick off, and anything can happen on a kickoff. You never want to give them good field position."

The defense did rise to the occasion, so Zorn's high-risk gamble worked.

But the Rams returned kickoffs to their 15, 16, 24 and 25. To have so little confidence in your kickoff coverage that you will forego points and risk losing on a field goal is an insult to the special teams.

The objective should be to score as many points as possible and put the pressure on the opposing offense.

The Redskins have scored 26 points in two games. So little offense is a disaster waiting to happen.

"Scoring only nine points is disappointing," said Redskins center Casey Rabach. "We did what we had to do to win. But we can't keep doing this."

Zorn got away with some risky decisions yesterday. He can't keep doing that either.

Contact Paul Woody at (804) 649-6444 or . Follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/World_of_Woody.